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Blimey, would you Adam and Eve it? Yep, that’s another week done and dusted, and with it a whole bunch of (hopefully) exciting video game news to digest. Being an EastEnders fan, I know how important catching up on stuff is, so that’s why I’m here to guide you through the biggest gaming stories of the past week before you bugger off down the pub, play some Fortnite, fire up Netflix, or do whatever it is you do on a Friday night. But first, I’ll get the important stuff out of the way…
Happy Birthday, EastEnders! The perpetually-depressing soap turned 34 this week, and saw the return of two legendary characters, for Dr. Legg’s funeral: Lofty, and Mary the Punk. Elsewhere, Sharon was shocked to find out that on-off lover Keanu Not Reeves had been beaten to a pulp while carrying out a dodgy job for Phil, in Spain, all the while dealing with the revelation that Louise might be pregnant. Never a dull moment in Walford, eh?
Elsewhere, I’m wondering how I’m going to cope with news that Danny ‘I’m fxxxing Danny Dyer’ Dyer prepares to leave EastEnders, albeit temporarily. The cockney hard man is off with his wife Linda after a turbulent year for the pair, thanks largely to bald baddie Stewart Highway. In real life, Danny’s taking a well-earned break, having been pulling pints in the Queen Vic for five years now.
Scalebound reportedly set for resurrection on Nintendo Switch
Scalebound was originally in development as an Xbox One-exclusive, and to date is probably the biggest casualty for Microsoft’s system. The format holder pulled the plug on the Platinum-Games-developed dragon-’em-up a few years ago now; although, murmurs this week have suggested it’ll be brought back from the brink on Nintendo Switch. To be fair, Platinum’s relationship with the Big N makes it an ideal fit for the hybrid platform, and we’ve heard rumours that a ‘long buried’ title is going to be coming to the Switch – is it Scalebound? Fingers crossed.
PlayStation Vita production is ending soon
Sony confirmed last year that production for the PlayStation Vita would be winding down in 2019, and now its Japanese site has confirmed that both remaining models for the troubled handheld are going the way of the Dodo. In other words, PS Vita’s days are at an end. Sniff. The system had such great potential, and its first year or so was a prime example of how a handheld could deliver console-quality video game experiences – it’s just a pity Sony didn’t decide to get behind it more.
Square Enix has a major game planned for release by March 2020
Square Enix has confirmed that its next major project will ship no later than March 2020, although right now we haven’t a clue what it will actually be. The studio has two major games in development, namely the Avengers project and Final Fantasy VII Remake, although both of those haven’t really done much in the last few years. Chances are it’s something new, and we’ll probably catch a glimpse of it at E3 this year.  One good thing is that Square revealed it’s hoping to trim down the time from announcing a game to its launch, which is a relief – I’m looking at you, FFVII Remake.
Rocksteady job ads suggest it’s prepping a game announcement
Rocksteady hasn’t said anything remotely resembling an official date on when it plans to reveal its next game, but a couple of positions that have opened up at the studio have suggested it might be soon. The jobs themselves involve marketing for a triple-A title, so the writing’s pretty much on the wall in that respect. With E3 a couple of months away, there’s every chance we’ll finally catch a glimpse at whatever Rocksteady is working on in June. One thing we do know is that it won’t be a Superman game.
Reggie Fils-Aime confirms his retirement, his replacement is Bowser
Reggie is a legend among gamers. His antics at E3 spawned a generation of memes, and he’s single-handedly responsible for cultivating the strong relationship that Ninty continues to enjoy with its fans. I’m sad to see him go, but he’s been in the game for 15 years, so fair play for wanting to retire and spend time with his family and friends. Also, his replacement is a guy called Doug Bowser; yep, someone who shares the same name as Mario’s arch-nemesis is taking over Nintendo of America. You could not make this s*** up. As for The Regginator, I’m sure I’m not the only one who has fond memories of him rocking up at E3 2004, or declaring that his ‘body is ready’ when faced with Wii Fit. Just one question, Reggie – where’s my new F-Zero game?!?
Xbox Anaconda and Lockhart reportedly due for E3 2019 reveal
Microsoft is poised to deliver a two-pronged next-gen attack at E3 this year, with the Anaconda and Lockhart set for a full reveal in June. That’s at least according to a new report online, which also lifted the lid on the supposed specs for each system – Xbox Lockhart being the ‘weakest’ iteration of Microsoft’s new machine. In addition, we’re apparently looking at a late 2020 release for the consoles, which sounds pretty realistic. By that point, the Xbox One would be seven-years-old, after all. The question is, with Sony skipping E3, what’s it going to do to counter Big Phil and chums?
Fortnite World Cup 2019 detailed, qualifiers start in April
Epic’s going all-out in its Fortnite World Cup 2019 event, announcing a prize pool of an eye-watering $100,000,000. The finals kick off in New York City in late July, with the winner walking away with a massive $30,00,000 alone. Blimey, I need to talk to that bloke down the gym for some battle royale tips, and sharpish…
