Rumble Roses Review

Much like the titular girls featured in the game, Rumble Roses is brash and brazen – it’s got ‘it’, up front, and it’s not afraid to show it off. Rumble roses also has something else in common with some of its girls – it’s a bit simple. It’s sexy, flashy and provocative, but it’s a bit on the ditsy side – can one aspect offset the other?

Following more on the heels of DOA: XBV than BMX XXX, Rumble Roses seems like a natural progression of the ‘scantily clad women in games’ formula. The girls on offer all conform to some fairly predictable archetypes – pop star, nurse, cowgirl and so on. Not what many would describe as classy, but then, being a wrestling game, Rumble Roses is hardly out to re-define the role of women in games. Indeed, the visual aspects of the women in the ring have clearly bore the brunt of the developer’s efforts, as much of the game, otherwise, is sorely lacking – even the characterisations of the fighters, an aspect which, had effort and consideration been put into, could have at least granted the game some charm, fail to convey any impression other than crassness.

It shouldn’t come as a surprise to hear that Rumble Roses can be a tad on the crass side – boobs bounce and pants flash, while the game panders with CPU vs. CPU mode and the equally eyebrow-raising Gallery mode where the camera pans around your chosen femme as she pats herself down and stretches out – it’s hard not to raise a smile and know that Sid James would be proud. In many respects this is ‘Carry on Wrestling’ in videogame form (minus the lecherous old men); the mud wrestling matches causes eyes to roll and the career mode cut-scenes prove to be embarrassingly camp.

More embarrassing, however, is how the developers have allowed these aspects to get in the way of making an involving wrestling game. Free from the confines of a major sports entertainment branding, Rumble Roses could have proven a charming and entertaining grappler; while Yuke’s Smackdown engine (which RR uses) isn’t the best example of a technical and complex wrestling game engine, it is certainly competent. Unfortunately, in this instance the developers have opted to restrain the dynamics of the game even further, making the resulting experience achingly unsophisticated and cursory.

Matches can take as little as 2 or 3 minutes to complete. Performing a succession of moves fills your killer/lethal move meter and once you’ve achieved a full bar you can then unleash your finishing technique by pressing L1 at any time – the effects of which are a guaranteed pinfall. In fact, the game plays more like a straight laced beat ’em up than a proper wrestling game – a prime example of that being the story mode. While other wrestling games’ story modes would follow the career of a chosen wrestler, Rumble Roses merely goes through the motions of a few fights linked loosely by some poorly voiced cut-scenes culminating in a battle against a rival and then the boss-type character Ms. X.

If the gameplay isn’t deep it’s certainly fast-paced, however, this approach doesn’t really suit the game well, failing to capture the essential ingredients that set wrestling games apart from standard fighters: the to-ing and fro-ing, the crowd-pleasing and the gloating. There’s no real wearing down of the opponent (aside from a nifty submission gauge which, once a hold is applied, will drain down and must be countered by mashing the joypad) – as a match progresses it doesn’t feel as though damage is being dealt, with only the finishing technique offering a chance to fell the challenger to the canvass. Apart from the story mode, only standard one-on-one and mud matches are available to play, foregoing the less ludicrous match types as seen in games like Smackdown, and even expected wrestling modes such as tag matches are missing – a seemingly bizarre and backwards steps for Yuke’s, seasoned developers as they are, to take.

Extras come in the form of alternate versions of each character which can be unlocked through the story mode, as can expected tantalisers such as skimpier outfits and the gallery mode – a feat which we imagine would have many players in a state of fervour to accomplish. Don’t be too quick to judge them though, as the attention to detail the developers have given over to modelling each of the fighters in the game is certainly of a very high standard and is truly impressive to behold – entrances, move animations and other, less wrestling-oriented, attentions to detail all look wonderful and prove where much of the development time was spent (in between regular visits to the bathroom, we assume). The drive to collect the unlockables is only as strong as the enjoyment you get from playing the story mode frequently, and the game just does not stand up well to repeat performances – matches feel samey and there is so little depth to play that it begins to bore after a while.

Rumble Roses feels like a missed opportunity – given its bombastic presentation and blasè attitude it’s disappointing to find it devoid of any real charm or wit. It also feels like a step backwards for Yuke’s – instead of building on the successes of the Smackdown series of games, they’ve created a cut-down, simple and restrained game, lacking in any real depth to make it a worthwhile contender for anyone’s hard earned cash. One for newcomers and adolescents, perhaps, but it’s unlikely to hold your attention for longer than a few days.