Alice’s Top 7 Most Anticipated Games of 2016

I’m usually very enthusiastic about games, but 2016 isn’t giving me a lineup I find that exciting. This list is presented on the understanding that I’m sadly not anticipating any games this year, so it’s therefore a list of games that I’m definitely going to buy. That’s about the best I can do for you at this point, I’m afraid.

Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End – PS4

There’s no way that Uncharted 4 is going to be bad, because Naughty Dog is too good at making Uncharted games now. We already know that it’ll be a fun (if linear) third person shooter, with a swashbuckling adventure theme: the deliberate lovechild of Indiana Jones and Lara Croft. This isn’t actually a bad thing, mind, and Nate is a much more charismatic player character than a standard Butch Everyman protagonist. I have absolutely no doubt that I will play Uncharted 4 and I will enjoy it, as will many of you.

The Legend of Zelda – Wii U, Wii

Have you ever met a Zelda game you didn’t like? That’s a rhetorical question. I’m sure some of you have, so there’s no need to inundate the comments. The point I’m making is that, like Uncharted, Zelda is an IP that can be relied upon to have a consistent standard, and an open world version on current gen will obviously be lovely. It looks smashing, doesn’t it? It might even inspire more of you to buy a Wii U. The Wii U is alright, you know. Honestly.

Firewatch – Mac OS, PC, PS4

Certain members of the editorial staff here may have laughed and described Firewatch as “that one where you, f***ing, pretend to be a fireman”, a sentence that is not technically incorrect, but which does undersell the potential of the game a bit. In my opinion wandering around a remote American forest, solving a possibly eldritch mystery and facing an unknown enemy as you go, could turn out to be very good. I don’t view ‘walking simulator’ as a derogatory term. I prefer simulated walking to actual walking.

Deus Ex: Mankind Divided – PC, PS4, Xbox One

Look, right, if we ever develop the appropriate technology I will replace pretty much all of myself with a better, mechanical version in a heartbeat (a cybernetic heartbeat, mind you, which is quicker and more efficient that the beat of a meat-grade heart).The first Deus Ex – which for my purposes refers to Human Revolution because I was a child when the actual first Deus Ex game came out – was good. If this is more Adam Jensen, but with sneakier sneaking, a sweeter leather duster, and robot arms that can function as guns, then I’ll get involved. I’m also interested in the terrorism and/or oppression plotline unfolding, which will no doubt be treated with the subtlety that video games apply to every topic.

Dishonored 2 – PC, PS4, Xbox One

Clearly stealthy assassination games are in vogue. Dishonored 2, patently incorrect spelling aside, has a lot going for it. Let’s lazily tick off the boxes together: Interesting playable characters? Check. Bloody assassinations? Check. Backdrop of political intrigue and betrayal? Check.

If it follows the same pattern as the first Dishonored then the concept we be similar to Hitman: assassinate a target in an open environment using one of the various means available, and no doubt comparisons will be drawn between the two because they’re both set to be out this year, despite the fact that they’ll differ wildly on every other point. The Dishonored 2 trailer looks, if anything, even more stylised-steampunk than its predecessor. It’ll be interesting to see how Dunwall has evolved in the fifteen in-game years since Dishonored, at any rate, because an economy built on whaling is clearly not sustainable.

No Man’s Sky – PC, PS4

It’s currently my firm belief that No Man’s Sky will be the best game anyone has ever played. It will fill us all with wonderment. We will discover new planets and name animals after various bits of genitalia in a truly hilarious fashion (the Lesser-spotted Dickfish, and so on). We will put down our controllers to stare out of the window at the sky bejewelled with real stars, and ponder the infinite mysteries of creation, and the possibility for other life in the galaxy. This will all be true for about an hour, tops, after which point all the entertainment will have been wrung out of a exploring a procedurally generated universe. That first hour will be great, though.

Mass Effect Andromeda – PC, PS4, Xbox One

The original Mass Effect trilogy has left a real, tangible legacy, and Andromeda will either live up to that as a spiritual successor, or be a total disappointment. The details are pretty scarce, to the point that it doesn’t quite seem real. Still, confirmed Mass Effect fans everywhere will be feeling little butterflies of excitement stirring, or perhaps more appropriately caterpillars of excitement that are starting to spin cocoons of misplaced hope, because if I were a betting woman I would say that odds are on for it not coming out this year.